Duolingo's April Fools' video makes fun of their owl's aggressive lesson reminders

Have Duolingo's aggressive reminders — "Learning Spanish requires daily practice. Practice now?" — crushed your life, isolating you from friends and family? There's a lawyer to help with that.

OK, not really. The language-learning app dropped an April Fools' Day video that pokes fun at itself, referencing the popular memes where the app's massive green owl threatens slacking pupils with violence.

The faux commercial from a fake law group promises to help victims of Duo, the company's mascot. It's actually a pretty decent April Fools' joke; it's clearly a gag and not being lame by actually trying to fool people. The faux commercial ends with a phone number, 781-STOP-OWL, and, committing to the bit, it actually works...so give it a ring if you need a good fake lawyer.

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US Police Were Ready to Arrest Will Smith Over Oscars Slap, Actor Was Never Pushed to Leave - Report

This year's Oscars was remembered by many not for the chic outfits of movie stars or some stunning acts of the show, but for a slap in the face and a verbal altercation between a comedian and a top actor because of a joke about his wife's hairstyle.

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Rice cooker hive, rise up: These are the ones we love the most

Rice is a staple in many families' diets, and such a staple should always be cooked well. If you're still resorting to cooking rice on the stove, we're here to say that a rice cooker will make your rice much, much better than you could ever cook in a pot.

Rice cookers are not all created equal. The simplest rice cookers will have a cooking setting and a keep warm setting, while the fanciest options will be able to cook basically every kind of rice and grain under the sun. Basic rice cookers merely bring water to a boil and shut off when the water is completely evaporated, but the more comprehensive cookers simulate soaking, boiling, and steaming the rice, leading to perfect, fluffy grains.

SEE ALSO: 7 of the best slow cookers right now, according to Amazon reviews

Why are Japanese and Korean rice cookers so expensive?

You really get what you pay for with a rice cooker — oftentimes the more expensive models will cook rice far better than their cheaper counterparts. Japanese and Korean brands are often pricey because they contain advanced rice cooking tech. Many high end rice cookers from brands like Zojirushi, Cuckoo, and Tiger contain Micom (short for microcomputer) technology. Micom tech essentially turns the rice cooker into a smart cooker, allowing it to adjust cooking time, temperature, and more to create the perfect batch of grains. This reduces room for human error by a lot, and makes these kinds of rice cookers virtually foolproof.

Japanese and Korean rice cookers normally have far more settings for different types of rice than other models too, and these dedicated settings ensure the proper cooking time and temperature for each kind of grain, from sushi rice to germinated brown rice.

Do I need to rinse my rice before cooking it?

In most cases, not even a rice cooker can make un-rinsed rice appetizing. Most rice varieties need to be rinsed before cooking to remove any impurities, as well as reduce the amount of starch that's stuck on the grains. Removing starch through rinsing ensures that you don't end up with overly sticky or gummy rice and helps the grains cook more evenly.

There are few exceptions to this rule, one of them being enriched white rice. If you're working with enriched rice that has added vitamins and minerals, rinsing will remove those extra nutrients.

Which rice cooker is the best?

Our top pick is the Zojirushi Neuro Fuzzy rice cooker. It's a bit pricey, but the variety of functions and the perfect rice it churns out make it worth it. For a multi-purpose pick, we love the classic Instant Pot Duo, and as a mid-priced option, the Cuckoo CR-0631F model makes fantastic rice (but is a bit difficult to clean).

Read on to discover more about our top nine rice cookers, and find the best one for your household — at every price point.

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Cleanup's a breeze with ceramic nonstick cookware

Nothing ruins a potentially great meal more than getting half of your culinary masterpiece stuck to the pan. Fortunately, ceramic-coated nonstick cookware exists to ensure that everything you cook easily slides out of the pot or pan without the added fat and calories of excess oil. Ceramic nonstick cookware is also usually known for being free of toxins so it can be great for your health in more ways than one.

Whether you’re looking for a little something that’ll add a pop of color to your kitchen space or you’re hoping to overhaul your entire kitchen arsenal, we’ve done the research and testing for you to round up some of the best ceramic nonstick cookware on the market—for all lifestyle needs and budgets.

How do I choose the right ceramic cookware set?

Choosing the right ceramic cookware is easy: First you’ll want to look for PTFE- and PFOA-free materials to ensure the health and safety of those you’re cooking for. From there, consider the pots or pans that you intend to use the most. For most people a 10-piece set is going to be more than enough. Also, consider if you’ll be wanting to put pans in the oven for cooking over time—some coatings don’t allow for that.

How much do ceramic cookware sets cost?

Ceramic cookware sets will range greatly in price—but you can find a decent set for around $100. Ceramic cookware that costs less than $50 might be crafted with toxic materials so always read the item description to be safe.

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8 cheap hosting services to help you claim your corner of the web

We're feeling a little philosophical, so riddle us this: If a tree falls in the woods, does anyone hear it? And if you don't have your own website in the ever-crowded wilderness of the World Wide Web, do you really even exist?

Well, yeah. The answer is obviously "yes" to both. But just like that mighty toppling oak, there will be no one there to marvel at your greatness and sing your praises (and potentially bring you some business) if you don't have a nice little corner of the web carved out for yourself. The question is, where you do you even begin?

Signing up for a web host is one of the very first steps to getting your website up and running, whether you're running a small business, advertising your talents, or just blogging for fun. The trick is finding one that meets your needs and your budget: You shouldn't be paying a premium for features you'll never actually use (think unlimited storage and emails), but at the same time, some of the free options might not include all of the tools you need for your site.

Cheap hosting wasn't always a thing, but many of the bigger providers out there now offer more affordable options that anyone can use to create their own website. These budget hosting plans usually come with fewer features than some of their premium counterparts, but they're still perfectly sufficient for individual needs. (Plus, you can always upgrade in the future if you need to scale up.)

With that in mind, remember that not all cheap hosting services are created equal, and there's still a lot you should take into consideration before entrusting one with your web presence. But don't worry: We're about to answer some of the most common questions on the matter so you can make the best possible decision for your cheap web hosting needs.

What is a web host, anyway?

Simply put, web hosting is a service that lets you rent out some space on a secure server where you can store files and post a website. You're basically claiming a plot of internet land where your online content lives.

We'll be talking specifically about cheap hosting plans that don't cost more than $5 per month, but you can click here to check out a list of our favorite web hosts at all price points.

What's the difference between cheap shared hosting and dedicated hosting?

Shared web hosting means your site will be hosted on a server that also hosts other people's sites. No one else can see or touch your files, but you'll all be able to tap into the same resources (i.e. storage and bandwidth). This drives down the per-person price of being hosted there, but since you share the same space and features, your site's performance can be affected if another person's site on the same server gets a lot of traffic.

On the flip side, dedicated hosting gives you a server all to yourself so you won't have to worry about anyone else hogging resources. Plans are usually pricier for this kind of hosting, unfortunately, so prepare to share if you're looking for a bargain on web hosting.

One happy medium can be a virtual private server (VPS) where server space is shared, but by much fewer sites — i.e., you're far less likely to experience performance issues because of your server mates. This option is more expensive than shared hosting, but way more budget-friendly than going the dedicated route.

What is WordPress hosting?

WordPress itself is a free, open-source content management system (CMS) that's ideal for creating highly customized websites, but especially blogs. If that's the kind of site you're going to be building, your best bet is to look into WordPress hosting. This is a special kind of hosting service that's optimized for websites made using WordPress; it'll make transferring your content from the WordPress CMS to your host's server super easy, and typically stays pretty cheap. (Bonus: A WordPress hosting provider usually handles all of the backend updates and tech stuff, so you don't have to worry about anything but your content.)

What can you reasonably expect to get with a cheap hosting plan?

Whether it's a portfolio site for your photography, an online shop, or a simple landing page with your business' basic contact info, your vision and needs for your website are ultimately going to dictate what parameters you should seek in a web host.

For example, you're likely to get anywhere from 10 to maybe 25GB of storage included with a cheap hosting plan. That should be sufficient for simplistic, mainly text-based sites, but if you plan on uploading a good amount of high-quality images and videos, you're better off splurging on an unlimited storage option.

As for limits on site traffic, you'll find that most hosting providers offer unlimited bandwidth even with their lowest-priced plans. This means you won't be charged extra or restricted based on the amount of traffic coming to your site. You might also see references to "unmetered" bandwidth, which is essentially a set amount of bandwidth that you can use to transfer as much data as you need. The maximum server speed may be limited, but you won't incur an extra fee for heavy traffic.

Most budget hosting plans will also throw in a free domain for a year, and a free SSL certificate for your site. (That stands for Secure Socket Layer, a security protocol that encrypts your traffic.)

What are the non-negotiables when it comes to inexpensive hosting?

Regardless of how much space you'll need or how much you'll be paying to have your site hosted, any self-respecting web host (cheap or not) should be providing customers with solid support options 24 hours per day, seven days per week. You don't want to be caught with your site down, period.

Along those same lines, you should absolutely not compromise when it comes to your web host's uptime. If your site is down, your audience or customers cannot reach you, and that almost always results in lost sales and opportunities. (Seriously, your web host has one job — to host your site — so reliable uptime is not too much to ask.) Fortunately, most web hosts abide by guarantees of 99% uptime or better.

What should I look out for when choosing a cheap web hosting plan?

To keep costs low in the long term, make sure you read the fine print before committing to a budget hosting plan. Most web hosts offer multiple tiers of service, and they often sweeten the deal on mid- to high-level plans with special introductory pricing. It'll seem like a bargain — and it is, at first — until it reverts to its regular monthly rate and you're stuck paying for a bunch of features that you don't actually need. You're usually better off sticking with the lowest-tier option that only includes your must-have features, even if it technically costs more than a discounted premium package for your first few months.

Also, be on the lookout for providers that require you to commit to a long-term plan in order to score the lowest monthly price. If you're not exactly sure what you'll need over time or how much your site will grow, you'll probably want to avoid a multiyear contract.

Now that you know what to look for, keep reading: Below, we've rounded up some of the best cheap web hosting plans for a variety of needs so you can score the best bang for your buck.

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The best sex toy deals as of March 30: Le Wand, Satisfyer, Magic Wand, and more

UPDATE: Mar. 22, 2022, 2:00 p.m. EDT This story has been updated to include the latest sex toy steals, including new price drops on Lelo toys.

• The We-Vibe Tango is a bullet vibe but better — $59 $79 (save $20)

• The Lelo Sila is a luxury suction vibrator that just got more affordable — $126.75 $169 (save $42.25)

• The Fleshlight Go Stamina Training Unit Lady Pack is an enticing offer from one of the best masturbation sleeve brands in the biz — $69.95 $81.85 (save $11.90)

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We're not saying that treating yourself to some new sex toys will almost certainly improve your life, but we're also not not saying that. Spending some money on upping your solo sesh game or adding a little spice with a partner is well worth the investment. Though we do believe in springing for well-made toys since you'll be putting them in, on, and around your genitals, that doesn't necessarily mean you have to drop a ton of cash. Every week, we'll be rounding up the best deals directly from manufacturers and online sex shops alike, so you can find a toy you'll love, at prices you'll love (almost) as much. Check out our finds from this week below.

Vibrator deals

Credit: We-Vibe

Our pick: We-Vibe Tango

$59 at We-Vibe (save $20)

Why we like it

Read more from Mashable about the We-Vibe Tango.

Think bullet vibrator, but better. The We-Vibe offers the perfect pinpointed vibrations, with a flat-topped lipstick-shaped head that's better than the rounded design you'll find on most bullet vibes. It's also waterproof and rechargeable, making it clear why Mashable culture reporter Anna Iovine deemed the Tango "the best bullet vibrator I've tried."

More vibrator deals:

• Pleasure Works Pirouette Waterproof Vibrator — $19.99 $27.99 (save $8)

• Satisfyer Magic Bunny Vibrator — $29.98 $79.99 (save $50.01 with code BLOOM)

• Adam & Eve Intimate Curves Rechargeable Wand — $34.98 $69.95 (save $34.97)

• We-Vibe Tango — $59 $79 (save $20)

• Original Magic Wand — $69.95 $99.99 (save $30.04 with code BLOOM)

• We-Vibe Touch — $79 $99 (save $20)

• Fifty Shades of Grey Greedy Girl Real-Feel Rabbit Vibrator — $42 $139.99 (save $97.99)

• Lelo Smart Wand — $104.99 $149.99 (save $45)

• MysteryVibe Crescendo — $171.75 $229 (save $57.25)

Clitoral stimulator and suction toy deals

Credit: Lelo

Our pick: Lelo Sila

$125.75 at Lelo (save $42.25)

Why we like it

Check out Mashable's review of the Lelo Sila.

Lelo's sex toys fall firmly into the luxury category, and their prices reflect that. But the Lelo Sila's sonic wave pulsations might just justify its price, especially since it's enjoying a nice discount. If you've been waiting to treat yourself with something extra fancy, the time is now — our reviewer deemed this toy "one of the most worthwhile, standout innovations in the suction toy category in quite a while."

More clitoral stimulator and suction toy deals:

• Satisfyer Twirling Joy Clitoral Vibrator — $39.99 $49.95 (save $9.96)

• Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Generation — $39.99 $59.99 (save $20)

• Womanizer Starlet 2 — $63.99 $79.99 (save $16)

• Better Love Tap Dancer — $69.99 $175.99 (save $106)

• Lelo Sona Cruise — $90.01 $137.99 (save $47.98)

• We-Vibe Tango and Satisfyer Pro 2 bundle — $96.99 $148.99 (save $52)

• Lelo Sona Cruise 2 — $111.20 $139 (save $27.80 with code BLOOM)

• Lelo Sila — $125.75 $169 (save $42.25)

• Womanizer Premium — $149 $199 (save $50)

Dildo deals

Credit: PinkCherry

Our pick: PinkCherry Lucky Dick Realistic 8.25-inch Dildo

$24.98 at PinkCherry (save $35.01 with code BLOOM)

Why we like it

When it comes down to it, everyone will have their own preferences when it comes to dildos (or any sex toys, for that matter), but here's why this one is worth a second look. The silicone material gives the dildo some flex, so you can find those just-right angles (which can feel even better thanks to its approachable size). The circular base doubles as a suction cup too, making this dildo easy to hold, fit into a harness, or stick on to the non-porous surface of your choosing.

More dildo deals:

• Lovehoney Dual Density Silicone Dildo with Balls — $13.50 $44.99 (save $31.49)

• Adam & Eve Cool Curve Jelly Dildo — $14.95 $24.95 (save $10)

• Lovehoney Spiral G-Spot Sensual Glass Dildo — $18.49 $36.99 (save $18.50)

• Adam & Eve Twisted Love Glass Dildo — $21.97 $39.95 (save $17.98 with code AESAVE45)

• Colours 5-inch Silicone Realistic Dildo — $21.97 $39.95 (save $17.98 with code AESAVE45)

• Blush Impressions N5 Vibrating Dildo with Suction Cup — $39.99 $69.99 (save $30)

• Kingcock Strap-on Harness with 8-inch Dildo — $49.47 $89.95 (save $40.48 with code AESAVE45)

• Le Wand Hoop — $115.96 $129.99 (save $14.03 with code BLOOM)

Deals on sex toys for penises

Credit: Fleshlight

Our pick: Fleshlight Go Stamina Training Unit Lady Pack

$69.95 at Fleshlight (save $11.90)

Why we like it

When it comes to sex toys specifically for people with penises, Fleshlight might just be the most recognizable name out there, and for good reason — they're masters at the masturbation sleeve. Fleshlight's sleeves have made our favorites list before, and this bundle comes with a compact version of one of the brand's most popular sleeves, the Stamina Training Unit, as well as lube and cleaner.

More deals on sex toys for penises:

• Ass-Gasm Penis Ring Plug — $12.62 $22.95 (save $10.33 with code AESAVE45)

• Super Head Honcho Masturbator — $16.47 $29.95 (save $13.48 with code AESAVE45)

• Lovehoney Solo Pleasure Male Sex Toy Kit — $35.99 $59.99 (save $24)

• Satisfyer Men Vibration Masturbator — $49.95 $84.99 (save $35.04)

• Buy 2 Fleshlight sleeves, get one free — $99.90 $149.85 (save $49.95)

• Lelo F1S V2 penis sleeve — $171.75 $229 (save $57.25)

• MysteryVibe Tenuto wearable vibrator — $211.65 $249 (save $37.35)

• Fleshlight Quickshot Launch Vantage Pack — $221.95 $246.85 (save $24.90)

Anal toy deals

Credit: Vedo

Our pick: Bump rechargeable anal vibe

$27.47 at Adam & Eve (save $22.48 with code AESAVE45)

Why we like it

From a glance alone, this Bump pick looks like a pretty good plug — it's not too big, not too small, has a nice tapered edge and a wind end for keeping things where you want them, and is silicone-smooth so it slides right in without friction. Once you realize it has 10 different vibration modes and can be submerged safely in water, well, you may just feel like you've won the butt plug lotto.

More anal toy deals:

• PinkCherry Triple Trainer Anal Kit — $19.95 $59.99 (save $40.04 with code BLOOM)

• Kink Trainer Kit — $27.47 $49.95 (save $22.48 with code AESAVE45)

• Bump Rechargeable Anal Vibe — $27.47 $49.95 (save $22.48 with code AESAVE45)

• Satisfyer Lolli Plug — $27.99 $39.99 (save $12)

• Sono No. 78 Anal Stimulator — $27.99 $59.99 (save $32)

• Je Joue Nuo Vibrating Butt Plug — $79 $139 (save $60)

• B-vibe Vibrating Snug Plug — $85 $100 (save $15)

Even more sex toy deals:

• Black Furry Hand Cuffs — $4.95 $19.99 (save $15.04 with code BLOOM)

• Sex! Card Game — $6.39 $12.99 (save $6.60 with code BLOOM)

• Temptasia Harness Strap-on Briefs — $16.99 $29.99 (save $13)

Explore related content:

• What to look for when buying a sex toy

• Where to buy sex toys online (even at Target)

• The best budget-friendly sex toys under $50

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Israel’s Hands ‘Not Tied’ by JCPOA Revival, US Ambassador to Jerusalem Says

The Israeli government has never trusted the 2015 Iran nuclear deal and supported then-US President Donald Trump’s 2018 withdrawal from the treaty. Israeli agents have long carried out sabotage and assassinations against Iran’s civil nuclear program, claiming without evidence that Iran was secretly pursuing a nuclear weapon.

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WH Says Biden Cannot Condemn Will Smith's Slap Because POTUS Has Not Seen It Yet

The US president might be the only person in the whole country (on Earth?) who hasn't seen Smith's "revenge" against comedian Chris Rock for making a joke about his wife, though the footage has gone viral and is now a major topic in the media.

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Yale University Manager Pleads Guilty to Stealing $40 Million in Decade-Long Fraud Scam

The ten-year-long criminal scheme allowed a university manager to collect several luxury cars along with multiple properties in several states.

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'Morbius' review: Jared Leto's vampire Marvel movie is a toothless bore

In the unrelenting flood of superhero stories hitting film and television, you might well feel overwhelmed by the Spider-Men, Eternals, The Batman, and Moon Knight of it all. Well, I've got some good news for you: Morbius is totally skippable. 

In an attempt to stand out, Sony's latest MCU-adjacent Spider-Man spinoff pitches plenty at audiences to see what sticks. Yet amid a barrage of stars, monster-on-monster violence, and science-gone-awry melodrama, what stands out most is everything that Morbius is not.

Directed by Daniel Espinosa, Morbius follows Michael Morbius (Jared Leto), a world-renowned doctor in search of a cure to the rare blood disease that afflicts him and his childhood friend Milo (Matt Smith). In aggressive exposition scenes, the good doctor will explain over and over how their DNA is missing a puzzle piece, but that missing bit might be found in vampire bats. Like so many Spidey cohorts before him, Morbius plays test subject to his dangerous experimental science. Behold! He achieves a glow-up that turns him from scrawny, peaked, and limping to brawny, bronzed, and parkouring. But at what cost? Yup. He's a vampire now. 

Morbius is not a vampire horror movie

Credit: Sony Pictures

Known canonically as "the living vampire," Morbius struggles with his new yearning for human blood, which initially pitches him into a murderous rampage. However, screenwriters Matt Sazama and Burk Sharpless treat vampire lore as little more than set dressing. So, there's an almost comical matter-of-factness to Morbius and his science pal/love interest Martine (Adria Arjona) discovering he's gone from sickly man to creature of myth. It's as if they're bored with the idea as soon as they learn about it. 

Besides ignoring the fun that might be had with exploring the tropes of vampire horror, Morbius also fails to be remotely scary. This is in part because its titular bloodsucker is dedicated to not being a bad guy, so there's no chilling moral grey area to play in. Further vexing the issue, the PG-13 rating (which is generally demanded for studio superhero movies to make their money back from the widest audience range possible) means that like The Batman, the supposed hard-hitting violence is ludicrously light on blood. "Artificial blood" dyed bright blue, offscreen violence, and lots of biting scenes shrouded in shadow keep scenes squeaky clean and woefully un-scary. 

SEE ALSO: 'The Batman' Review: A crime-thriller suffocated by PG-13 demands

Morbius is not a satisfying cat-and-mouse crime thriller

Credit: Sony Pictures

That initial killing spree leaves a pile of bodies and a lot of questions. On the case is a pair of FBI agents, one stern (Tyrese Gibson), one snarky (a blessedly bemusing Al Madrigal). However, their chasing down clues is far from the center of the film, so it becomes just another element half-heartedly explored.

Madrigal brings spark to his wise-cracking cop character. But there's no actual suspense born from this investigation, in part because the audience is given no reason to think the blood-craving vampire couldn't just break out. After all, it seems every time he's in a pinch, Morbius uncovers a new power that can save his day — like the abrupt realization he can fly away! 

Morbius is not really a superhero movie

Credit: Sony Pictures

It's not even a super-anti-hero movie like Venom or Venom: Let There Be Carnage. Yes, Morbius is based on a Marvel Comics character. So, it's technically a superhero movie. And it does include fight scenes, an evil antagonist, and a protagonist who is helped yet haunted by his superpowers.

However, defying the standards the DCEU and the MCU have forged in this genre, there's little in the way of heroics or derring-do here. He's not directly trying to rescue anyone or setting out to topple some massive malevolent force. Mostly Morbius is just cleaning up his own mess, trying to prevent the vampirism he released from making the world worse. But even this goal is abruptly abandoned to make way for the one superhero movie trope this movie hits hard: setup for a sequel. 

Morbius is barely a Marvel movie

Credit: Sony Pictures

Don't be fooled by the trailers that make mention of Venom, flash Spider-Man street art in the background, and tease Michael Keaton's return as The Vulture. Eddie Brock and his symbiote bestie are mentioned only as "that thing that happened in San Francisco," and as an inexplicable joke, where Morbius identifies himself as "Venom." That's it. 

As for Adrian "The Vulture" Toomes, he's not a part of the plot, despite what the trailers would have you believe. Slight spoilers: Toomes only appears in a pair of sequences that pop up awkwardly in the credits to tease a could-be sequel. As thrilling as it is to see Keaton's Vulture back in action, fans of the Sony Spidey-verse movies deserve better than the return of Leto's bland bloodsucker, who can't even brood with conviction. 

Morbius is catastrophically unfun 

Credit: Sony Pictures

Ruthless pacing rushes audiences across decades, around the globe, and through tiresome info-dumps about pseudo-science, bat behavior, and backstories. It's as if Espinosa doesn't trust we'll actually find this story interesting, so he allows no moments to breathe. Or perhaps, the speedy pacing is to make up for the lack of verve of the cast, many of whom speak in a tired tone as if they'd been dragged out of bed right before shooting — or maybe the hope is that if the plot moves fast enough, you won't have time to notice how achingly predictable every beat is, and how two-dimensional every character is. In a film that bounds from Costa Rica to Greece to New York City to "International Waters," this whole world only has six characters of consequence, and most of them could be summed up with a short phrase like "brainy love interest," "roguish bestie," and "father figure doomed to die because this is a superhero movie in only the most tedious ways." 

Be it House of Gucci, WeCrashed, or Suicide Squad's Joker, Leto isn't much for subtlety. Similarly, Matt Smith has brought plenty of character to Doctor Who, The Crown, and Last Night in Soho. Yet here, both deliver dull imitations of their past performances. When his face isn't papered over by CGI-vampire features, Leto's expression is pretty but blank, as if he's in an ad for men's cologne. Playing more of a wild man, Smith gets to have a bit more fun, throwing his body into a frenzy of dance and occasional menace. Yet, in a realm where vampires are real and where we know Eddie Brock has leapt into a lobster tank, this all feels frustratingly timid, from the flat performances to the predictable plot points, the bloodlessness, and the shameful lack of style. 

SEE ALSO: Surprise! Venom is the superhero who defines this pandemic moment

Grim greys and sickly greens paint settings that include unremarkable warehouses, laboratories, and hallways. The costumes are functional and forgettable, rarely fashionable or fun. Even the creature designs are unimpressive, feeling like a computer-generated ripoff of the Buffy The Vampire Slayer prosthetics. They're not bad, but neither are they fresh or frightening. No amount of slow-motion battle scenes can make up for that.

In the end, Morbius is trying to do much, much more than the Marvel/Sony movies that have come before (which is saying something). But lacking in style, spirit, scares, and suspense, this would-be thriller is a toothless and tedious chore. 

Morbius opens in theaters on April 1.

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Biden: U.S. Running Out of Funds for COVID19

Earlier this week, the CDC announced that people 50 and older are now eligible for a fourth COVID19 shot in the nation’s ongoing fight against the pandemic. Hospitalizations and cases are falling but some experts warn that the BA.2 variant may lead to a surge in the fall.

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Scientists Finally Discover What Lies Behind Parrots’ Extraordinary Longevity

Parrots are known for their remarkable cognitive abilities and exceptionally long lives. In captivity, some have been recorded to live 80-90 years. The mystery of their longevity has eluded scientists for years but appears to have finally been cracked.

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US Naming Commission to Review Whether 750 Pentagon ‘Items’ Celebrate Confederate Persons

WASHINGTON (Sputnik) - The congressional Naming Commission announced it will review more than 750 “items” related to the Defense Department - markers, displays, monuments, vessels, streets, buildings, bridges & installations - to determine whether they celebrate persons who voluntarily served the Confederacy and recommend a name change or removal.

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Disney Executive Calls for ‘Many, Many’ LGBTQ Characters in Future Films

Disney recently jumped into Florida politics by vowing to help repeal a new law nicknamed “Don’t Say Gay” by its critics, although the corporate media giant was revealed to have donated to the campaigns of every lawmaker who sponsored the bill.

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Academy Says Will Smith Refused to Leave Oscars Show After Slapping Chris Rock

WASHINGTON (Sputnik) - US actor Will Smith was asked to leave the Academy Awards show on Sunday after he hit comedian Chris Rock on stage but refused, the organization said in a statement.

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Trump: America Looks ‘Like a Third World Country’

Former President Trump has compared the United States to a third world country due to supply chain issues causing a shortage of bread, jewelry and office furniture.

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Egypt Out of World Cup After Fans Shine Laser in Salah's Face & Penalty Shot Sails Over Post

The biggest match of the CAF qualification for the 2022 World Cup was the contest between Egypt and Senegal. The two teams met in the African Cup of Nations final mere months ago and field the two strongest football players in Africa, Liverpool teammates Mohamed Salah and Sadio Mane.

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'Poor Baby' Smith

Actor Will Smith punched comedian Chris Rock at the 94th Oscar Awards, while the latter was announcing the winner for best documentary. Rock joked about Smith's wife, Jada Pinkett Smith, asking when G.I. Jane 2 would be released. Last year, Pinkett-Smith was forced to shave her head as she started losing hair due to an autoimmune disease.

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Nancy Pelosi Says Democracy is On The Line During the Midterms But Isn’t Worried

The party that controls the White House historically loses seats in Congress in the midterms, but that does not concern Nancy Pelosi, even as she states that democracy itself is at risk.

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NASA Thinks Pluto May Still Have Erupting Ice Volcanoes, Harbor Liquid Water Inside

When NASA’s New Horizons probe zipped past Pluto in July 2015, it was the first and only time Earthlings got a close look at the Kuiper Belt’s biggest and closest resident.

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US to Continue Causing Russia Problems Even if Peace Deal Reached With Kiev - Ex-Official

WASHINGTON (Sputnik) - The United States will continue to cause Moscow problems even if the Biden administration allows Ukraine to sign a peace deal with Russia, former US Assistant Treasury Secretary Paul Craig Roberts told Sputnik.

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WHO Probing Instances of Tinnitus, Hearing Loss Caused by COVID-19 Vaccines - Report

The World Health Organization (WHO) said in a recent newsletter it was investigating several hundred cases of hearing loss and tinnitus associated with receiving COVID-19 vaccines.

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World Facing Food Shortages, Not Just Pricing Issues - WFP Chief

UNITED NATIONS (Sputnik) - The availability of food has become a problem alongside surging prices, David Beasley, executive director for the UN World Food Programme, said on Tuesday.

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Kremlin Says Biden's Remarks on Putin 'Alarming,' 'Personal Insult'

WASHINGTON (Sputnik) - Kremlin spokesman Dmitry Peskov said US President Joe Biden's remarks that Russian President Vladimir Putin "cannot remain in power" were alarming and represent a person insult.

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US Senate Passes China Competition Bill, Progresses to Resolution With House Version

WASHINGTON (Sputnik) - The US Senate passed the America COMPETES Act legislation to increase competitiveness with China on economic and national security matters, moving the bill forward to resolve differences with the House version.

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Academy Launches Probe As Netizens Call for Will Smith to Be Stripped of Oscar

WASHINGTON (Sputnik) - The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences condemns actor Will Smith’s attack on comedian Chris Rock during the 94th “Oscars” Academy Awards ceremony, the organization said on Monday in a statement quoted by US media.

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IRGC Chief Says ‘Eternal Fear’ Keeps Iran’s Enemies From Attacking Islamic Republic

Earlier this month, Iran’s Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps (IRGC) launched a missile attack against what they called “Israeli strategic centers” in the Iraqi city of Erbil, reportedly in revenge for an attack on a drone facility in the Iranian city of Kermanshah by the Israeli Mossad weeks prior.

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Oil Ends Down 7% on China Covid Scare

NEW YORK (Sputnik) - Oil prices tumbled 7 percent after China’s lockdown of its Shanghai financial hub over a Covid scare, and the market fell further in after-hours trade.

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Will Smith has apologized to Chris Rock for slapping him at the Oscars

Will Smith has taken to Instagram to apologize to Chris Rock, a day after slapping the comedian on stage during the Oscars.

"Violence in all of its forms is poisonous and destructive," Smith wrote in a black and white text post on his Instagram. "My behavior at last night’s Academy Awards was unacceptable and inexcusable. Jokes at my expense are a part of the job, but a joke about Jada’s medical condition was too much for me to bear and I reacted emotionally."

SEE ALSO: Chris Rock won't press charges against Will Smith for that Oscars slap

Smith had confronted Rock during the presentation of Best Documentary Feature, after the latter made a jab at Jada Pinkett Smith's baldness — a condition caused by the autoimmune disease alopecia. The King Richard actor mounted the stage and hit Rock across the face, before returning to his seat and shouting, "Keep my wife's name out your fucking mouth!"

Having had a night to reflect, Smith has now apologized to Rock for his behavior.

"I would like to publicly apologize to you, Chris," Smith wrote. "I was out of line and I was wrong. I am embarrassed and my actions were not indicative of the man I want to be. There is no place for violence in a world of love and kindness." 

View this post on Instagram

Smith also reiterated his apology to the Academy, after previously addressing the issue during his Best Actor acceptance speech.

"I would also like to apologize to the Academy, the producers of the show, all the attendees and everyone watching around the world," wrote Smith. "I would like to apologize to the Williams Family and my King Richard Family. I deeply regret that my behavior has stained what has been an otherwise gorgeous journey for all of us. I am a work in progress."

Rock has not yet commented publicly about the incident, however the Los Angeles Police Department issued a statement noting that he has declined to file charges against Smith.

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US Envoy to Iran Pours Cold Water on Claim Nuclear Deal ’Imminent’

High-ranking US officials caution the Iran nuclear deal may not be as close as it seems, as a skeptical Israeli government promises to play by its own rules.

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Oscars 2022 red carpet: See Jessica Chastain, Wanda Sykes and more of your favs

The 94th Academy Awards are now upon us, along with the promise of cringey moments, memorable (for better or for worse) speeches, entertaining surprises, upsets and more.

While the ongoing pandemic continues to cut into box office performance — total earnings in 2021 are basically half what they were in a record-setting 2019 — there's been a flood of movies arriving as COVID-delayed productions got back to work, and our favs are out to celebrate those tonight.

As we wait for the show to get underway, here's a glimpse of fan favs on their way into the event, which will be hosted by Wanda Sykes, Regina Hall and Amy Schumer.

You can watch the Oscars live tonight or, even better, just check back for more of Mashable's coverage.

Oscars 2022 host Wanda Sykes

HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA - MARCH 27: (L-R) Alex Sykes and Wanda Sykes attend the 94th Annual Academy Awards at Hollywood and Highland on March 27, 2022 in Hollywood, California. Credit: (Photo by Emma McIntyre/Getty Images)

Laverne Cox

HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA - MARCH 27: Laverne Cox attends the 94th Annual Academy Awards at Hollywood and Highland on March 27, 2022 in Hollywood, California. Credit: (Photo by Mike Coppola/Getty Images)

Zendaya

HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA - MARCH 27: Zendaya attends the 94th Annual Academy Awards at Hollywood and Highland on March 27, 2022 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/WireImage) Credit: Kevin Mazur/WireImage

Tracee Ellis Ross

HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA - MARCH 27: Tracee Ellis Ross attends the 94th Annual Academy Awards at Hollywood and Highland on March 27, 2022 in Hollywood, California. Credit: (Photo by Emma McIntyre/Getty Images)

This is a developing story. Visit Mashable throughout the night for updates.

Reporting by Adam Rosenberg contributed to this report.

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‘Regime Change’ in Russia Not One of NATO’s Goals, German's Scholz Says

BERLIN (Sputnik) - German Chancellor Olaf Scholz says NATO does not have a goal of implementing a "regime change" in Russia.

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Explosives Attack in Bogota Leaves One Child Dead, Several Others Injured - Mayor

MEXICO CITY (Sputnik) - One child died and over ten other people were injured in an explosion next to a police station in Colombia’s capital Bogota, the city’s mayor, Claudia Lopez Hernandez, said.

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'No': Biden Walks Back His Calls For Regime Change in Russia - Video

The 45th claimed on Saturday that President Putin "cannot remain in power." Amid the domestic and international backlash over the comments, US officials are now trying to soften his words, but the damage has already been done.

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All the winners from the 2022 Oscars

The time has finally come for the 2022 Oscars, when Hollywood's biggest names and brightest rising stars reunite at the Dolby Theatre in Los Angeles to celebrate the year's best films.

It's been an understated awards season, with two streamers going head to head for an historic Best Picture win at the 94th Academy Awards: Will it go to Netflix's suspenseful Western, The Power of the Dog, or will Apple TV+'s feel-good family flick CODA come out on top? And is this going to be the year we can finally give Will Smith his Oscar?! The unknown is what makes the night all the more exciting. Or excruciating, depending on how you look at it.

Here are the night's big winners, which we'll be updating throughout the show.

Best Picture

Belfast

CODA 

Don’t Look Up 

Drive My Car

Dune

King Richard

Licorice Pizza

Nightmare Alley

The Power of the Dog

West Side Story

Best Director

Kenneth Branagh (Belfast)

Ryûsuke Hamaguchi (Drive My Car)

Paul Thomas Anderson (Licorice Pizza)

Jane Campion (The Power of the Dog)

Steven Spielberg (West Side Story)

Best Lead Actor

Javier Bardem (Being the Ricardos)

Benedict Cumberbatch (The Power of the Dog)

Andrew Garfield (Tick, Tick … Boom!)

Will Smith (King Richard)

Denzel Washington (The Tragedy of Macbeth)

Best Lead Actress

Jessica Chastain (The Eyes of Tammy Faye)

Olivia Colman (The Lost Daughter)

Penélope Cruz (Parallel Mothers)

Nicole Kidman (Being the Ricardos)

Kristen Stewart (Spencer)

Best Supporting Actor

Ciarán Hinds (Belfast)

Troy Kotsur (CODA)

Jesse Plemons (The Power of the Dog)

J.K. Simmons (Being the Ricardos)

Kodi Smit-McPhee (The Power of the Dog)

Best Supporting Actress

WINNER: Ariana DeBose (West Side Story)

Jessie Buckley (The Lost Daughter)

Judi Dench (Belfast)

Kirsten Dunst (The Power of the Dog)

Aunjanue Ellis (King Richard)

Best Adapted Screenplay

CODA, Siân Heder

Drive My Car, Ryûsuke Hamaguchi, Takamasa Oe

Dune, Jon Spaihts, Denis Villeneuve, Eric Roth

The Lost Daughter, Maggie Gyllenhaal

The Power of the Dog, Jane Campion

Best Original Screenplay

Belfast, Kenneth Branagh

Don’t Look Up, Adam McKay, David Sirota

King Richard, Zach Baylin

Licorice Pizza, Paul Thomas Anderson

The Worst Person in the World, Eskil Vogt, Joachim Troer

Best Cinematography

Dune, Greig Fraser

Nightmare Alley, Dan Laustsen

The Power of the Dog, Ari Wegner

The Tragedy of Macbeth, Bruno Delbonnel

West Side Story, Janusz Kamiński

Best Animated Feature Film

Encanto

Flee

Luca

The Mitchells vs. the Machines

Raya and the Last Dragon

Best Animated Short Film

WINNER: "The Windshield Wiper"

"Affairs of the Art"

"Bestia"

"Boxballet"

"Robin Robin"

Best Costume Design

Cruella 

Cyrano 

Dune 

Nightmare Alley 

West Side Story

Best Original Score

WINNER: Dune, Hans Zimmer

Don’t Look Up, Nicholas Britell

Encanto, Germaine Franco

Parallel Mothers, Alberto Iglesias

The Power of the Dog, Jonny Greenwood

Best Sound

WINNER: Dune 

Belfast 

No Time to Die 

The Power of the Dog 

West Side Story

Best Original Song

"Be Alive" (King Richard), Beyoncé Knowles-Carter, Dixson

"Dos Oruguitas" (Encanto), Lin-Manuel Miranda

"Down to Joy" (Belfast), Van Morrison

"No Time to Die" (No Time to Die), Billie Eilish, Finneas O’Connell

"Somehow You Do" (Four Good Days), Diane Warren

Best Documentary Feature

Ascension 

Attica

Flee

Summer of Soul (…Or, When The Revolution Could Not Be Televised)

Writing With Fire 

Best Documentary Short Subject

WINNER: "The Queen of Basketball"

"Audible"

"Lead Me Home"

"Three Songs for Benazir"

"When We Were Bullies"

Best Film Editing

WINNER: Dune

Don’t Look Up

King Richard

The Power of the Dog

Tick, Tick … Boom!

Best International Feature Film

Drive My Car (Japan)

Flee (Denmark)

The Hand of God (Italy)

Lunana: A Yak in the Classroom (Bhutan)

The Worst Person in the World (Norway)

Best Makeup and Hairstyling

WINNER: The Eyes of Tammy Faye

Coming 2 America

Cruella 

Dune 

House of Gucci 

Best Production Design

WINNER: Dune 

Nightmare Alley 

The Power of the Dog

The Tragedy of Macbeth

West Side Story 

Best Visual Effects

Dune 

Free Guy 

No Time to Die 

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings 

Spider-Man: No Way Home 

Best Live Action Short Film

WINNER: "The Long Goodbye"

"Ala Kachuu – Take and Run"

"The Dress"

"On My Mind"

"Please Hold"

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Denver Jury Awards $14 Million to Protesters Injured in May 2020 Riots

After the murder of Minnesota resident George Floyd by a local police officer in May 2020, Denver, Colorado saw some of the largest protests against police violence that occurred across the United States.

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Zurich Insurance Considering Scrapping ‘Z’ Logo Fearing Misinterpretation - Reports

MOSCOW (Sputnik) - Swiss insurance company Zurich Insurance Group is removing its "Z" logo from social media fearing that it could be misinterpreted as an expression of support for Russia’s special military operation in Ukraine, The Telegraph reports.

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UN Staff Building Damaged During Coalition Airstrikes in Sanaa

UNITED NATIONS (Sputnik) - A building housing United Nations employees was damaged during the airstrikes carried out by the Saudi-led coalition in Yemen’s Sanaa, Stephane Dujarric, Spokesperson for UN Secretary-General Antonio Guterres, said.

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Russian Ambassador Summoned by Czech Foreign Ministry

PRAGUE (Sputnik) - The Czech Foreign Ministry says it has summoned Russian Ambassador in Prague Alexander Zmeyevsky.

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GOP Wants to Subpoena Hunter Biden Over Leaked Emails If They Regain Majority in Congress

More than a year after the presidential election and long after the story of Hunter Biden's infamous laptop was suppressed by much of the media, The New York Times finally acknowledged the authenticity of the extracted emails revealing the controversial dealings of the president’s son, who actively exploited the political influence of his family.

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Photo: Mike Schumacher Cheers Up Fans After Horror Crash in Saudi Arabia Grand Prix Qualifying

The son of a former F1 champion racer suffered a horrific accident during qualifying in Jeddah, hitting the wall at 170mph on the exit of Turn 12 on the Jeddah circuit. His car was torn to pieces as a result of the crash.

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Video: One Dead in Texas Helicopter Crash After Tail Rotor Breaks Off Mid-Flight

On Friday morning a helicopter in Rowlett, Texas, crashed in a dense commercial area. Officials have confirmed that the pilot died in the crash, some sources are saying there may have been a second person in the helicopter who died as well.

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Polish General: Warsaw Should Lay Claim to Russia's Kaliningrad Region Over Its Historical Ties

WARSAW (Sputnik) - An ex-commander of the Polish ground forces, General Waldemar Skshipchak, on Friday expressed his opinion that Poland should lay claim to the westernmost Russian region of Kaliningrad due to Warsaw's historical ties with the region.

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Trump, Eldest Sons to Be Deposed in Lawsuit Alleging Promotion of Multi-Level Marketing Scam

Between 2006 and the announcement of his presidential campaign in 2015, Donald Trump held a working relationship with the American Communications Network (ACN), a multi-level marketing company that has been the recipient of multiple allegations of illegal business practices in its acquisition of new clients and sales of its products.

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US Lists Russian Kaspersky Lab Firm, China Telecom as 'National Threats'

The US Federal Communications Commission (FCC) is required to publish and update a list of communications equipment and services that pose a danger to national security or to Americans. Last year, the FCC noted five Chinese enterprises as the first to be included on the "covered list" of the US telecom regulator.

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Video: North Korea Releases Recording of Latest ICBM Launch

North Korea has been launching rockets without payloads over the past few weeks, in what it said were satellite tests. The United States and South Korea now say those tests were likely trial runs of parts of a new missile.

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AOC: Biden Losing Young Voters, Needs to Cancel Student Debt

Despite past campaign promises to eliminate $10,000 worth of student debt, US President Biden has failed to deliver on the vow and has instead only offered Americans a temporary pause on their repayment plans. The president has urged Americans to use the pause to ready themselves when monthly payments are resumed.

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‘No Realistic Way’ for EU to Replace Russian Gas Despite US Help - Ex-Texas Oil Regulator

WASHINGTON (Sputnik) - The European Union has no realistic path to replace all of the Russian natural gas it needs even if the US boosts exports or other states divert shipments, former Texas industry regulator Ryan Sitton told Sputnik.

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US Sanctions Firms, Individuals in Russia, China & North Korea for Alleged Arms Proliferation

WASHINGTON (Sputnik) - The United States sanctioned six entities based in China, Russia, and North Korea for allegedly being involved in proliferation activities, the US Department of State said.

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Italy Misses World Cup Again After Shocking Defeat by North Macedonia in Qualifying Playoffs

The Italian national team became the European champion for the second time in July 2021, and the Italians won four times at the world championships. In the qualifying tournament, the team of Roberto Mancini took second place in Group C.

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Russia's Medvedev Says Moscow May Revise Moratorium on Death Penalty if Necessary

MOSCOW (Sputnik) - Moscow may revise the moratorium on the death penalty in the country in the event of arising necessity, as there are no more international restrictions on the matter after the suspension of Russia's membership in the Council of Europe, Russian Security Council Deputy Chairman Dmitry Medvedev has told Sputnik.

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UK Police Arrest Seven Over Lapsus$ Hacks Linked to 16-Year-Old Oxford Resident

Cybercriminal collective Lapsus$ has taken responsibility for a plethora of security breaches in the tech sector, including a February leak of a US chipmaker’s proprietary information and recent cyberattacks against Microsoft and Okta, a San Francisco-based identity and access management company.

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Joe Biden Says He’d Be ‘Very Fortunate’ to Face Trump Again in 2024 Election

While discussing the Ukraine crisis at a news conference at the NATO headquarters in Brussels, US President Biden raised some eyebrows as he was asked whether he was worried the next administration may undo the work his foreign policy has done to bring the US and its allies closer.

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Poll: 71% of Republican Voters Say They’re Voting ‘Against Biden’ This Year

A poll released on Thursday revealed that a majority of Republicans would vote “against President Biden” in the upcoming midterms. The Pew Research Center found that 71% of registered Republican and Republican-leaning voters who were surveyed say they would vote against the president, with 46% of Democrat voters casting a vote “for” Biden.

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